Better late than never, right? I was looking through various files today, and came across an article sent to me weeks ago that somehow I missed. It doesn’t happen very often, I promise (so please keep them coming!). With a similar admonition not to go grocery shopping on your lunch hour after you missed breakfast, no one should probably write a blog when they are frustrated, and a bit peeved at themselves.
Here’s the thing; sometimes we disregard our own good advice, and go for it! 
Before I start, I admit that people who write articles and blogs have distinct opinions about whatever they pen. They don’t have to be experts or even possess first-hand knowledge of what they are writing about for it to make print. The First Amendment guarantees freedom of speech in any form, after all. If journalists or bloggers feel strongly enough, or have “plausible” and passionate ideas about the topic, people will read the words and listen to the intent. Opinions can certainly be influenced.
What a tremendous responsibility it is to write any commentary, and what a shame it becomes when people use the medium of print to promote incendiary philosophies or spiteful mandates, all in the name of God!
A few months ago, Miami Archbishop Thomas Wenski sent a memo to all of his church employees reiterating his mandate that “any expression of support for gay marriage, even if it is just a tweet or Facebook post”, would cost church employees and Eucharistic ministers their jobs and positions in their church. A few news agencies in the U.S. picked up the story (I remember now…I was in Europe at the time). A few journalists made provocative comments. The story died quickly.
“Not my Circus, not my Monkeys, not my Problem!” (Polish Idiom)
Not everyone reading this mandate will appreciate the impact these words have on not only the Rev. Wenski’s employees, but all Christians (straight or gay) everywhere. This is not an isolated religious, strictly Christian or contemporary issue. For a brief moment, substitute the words “black”, “white”, “Hispanic”, “mentally ill”, “poor”, “physically handicapped” etc… for the word “gay”. How does that make you feel?
You might be familiar with the phrase “Not in My Back Yard” (NIMBY), a term referring to the opposition of any kind… to just about anything, particularly that which changes the landscape, culture, serenity or mind-set of an individual or nation. This phrase was first coined in the 1950s to describe the predictable changes that took place in various neighborhoods when America became a true melting pot, “welcoming” people from all countries, races, cultures and religions to find freedom and a better way of life. Established neighborhoods balked at the new immigrants who brought their foreign languages, strange foods, odd cultures and religious practices. The term itself became a recognized stance of obstinacy against those ideas that threatened the status quo.
Fortunately, today’s trend is toward “multiculturalism” in our nation, not forced assimilation. Once held cultural and religious absolutes (women/black right to vote, interracial/interfaith marriage, surrogacy, birth control, etc…) have changed or modified because of decades of respectful discussion. Homosexual “unions” are not a recent thing, or a result of our lack of prayer in our schools, as many would have you believe. Gays have been around since man (and woman) walked the earth. Similar to many mental health issues that are finally getting the attention they deserve, we just didn’t want to acknowledge or talk about “such things” until recently.
“Hey, I don’t care if those gay people are getting married and adopt all them foreign kids, but I sure don’t want them living in my neighborhood!”(NIMBY). Comments like this are just as punitive as Rev. Wenski’s words to quash a healthy discussion on homosexuality and gay marriage.
E. Pluribus Unum, “From Many to One”
There are over fifty versions of the Bible in English, and hundreds of thousands of biblical scholars from all religions around the world who gleen different interpretations of the same passages! All sin is abhorrent in the eyes of God. There are no “major or minor” sins that serve to cloud our vision of the Almighty to fall from Grace, although there is certainly a debate between religious leaders as to how far to push the envelope of “true sin”.
For example, before 1958, the bible passage “Be ye not unevenly yoked” (2 Corinthians 6:14) was meant to discourage close fellowship among believers and unbelievers, and was regularly used to discriminate against interfaith, intercultural and interracial marriage! Pope Francis recently declared that while most homosexuals do not embrace chastity (sex before marriage is a grave sin in most churches), “If they accept the Lord and have goodwill, who am I to judge? They should not be marginalized. Homosexuality is not the problem…they are our brothers”.
In fact, Rev. Wenski does not mirror a “common policy” amongst all Catholics. In other areas of the world (Germany, for example) Catholic bishops are set to change their employment policies to allow gays and lesbians, as well as divorced and remarried Catholics to return to the church. Bishops in Belgium are doing the same. Many more Protestant churches are following suit. Thirty-six U.S States and eighteen international countries have legalized or recognize marriage equality since 2003.
Christian conservatives have been among the most ardent opponents of gay marriage and rights nationwide. Russell Moore, president of the Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission of the Southern Baptist Convention contends that “anyone who supports gay marriage is not an evangelical”. Ryan Anderson, a Catholic and fellow at Heritage Foundation is a powerful voice among young conservatives who predicts that regardless what the 6th Circuit rules in 2015, many evangelicals will remain opposed to gay marriage. This does not uphold the fact that from 2003 to 2013 the support for gay couples among white evangelicals has more than doubled. Support among Catholics also rose by 22% during that time. (Jonathan Merritt www.jonathanmerritt.com ,“On Faith and Culture”)
Justin Lee, Founder of the Gay Christian Network, was recently interviewed and asked to respond to the comment, “Even in the LGBT community, there are different theological perspectives on whether or not God approves of same-sex relationships”. Justin replied, “Our goal is not to change each other’s mind, but to treat one another with Christian love”. Although scientific discoveries and current biblical scholars firmly support the side of equality, Justin further adds “Let’s put this debate aside for a moment and get to know one another as human beings, even though we have this massive, massive disagreement.” (Melissa Binder, mbinder@oreogonian.com, “Faith and Values”, Jan. 02, 2015)
There are those that would vehemently argue that what takes place in ultra-liberal Europe or outside their own diocese should have no validation as to what happens in the entire USA, as if in reality it has any bearing at all!
My point (in case you are missing it) is this: Even though Wenski’s dictate was directed to his own employees, it has negatively affected the gay marriage debate by encouraging people (particularly Wenski’s employees) not to speak out for or against gay marriage in fear of losing their jobs! You may not be a member of Rev. Wenski’s parish, religious or even gay, but the fact of the matter is, the discussion about equal rights and basic, lawful protections does affect you. It affects every one of us. Every opinion matters, even Rev. Wenski’s. Anyone who has access to a platform, who is privileged to hold an audience or promote a concept or ideal, has a responsibility to voice their own opinion as long as it is respectful.
You cannot make someone respect you, validate you, honor your point of view or most troubling of all, love you unless they are open to the possibility and believe in the benefit of offering affection and compassion to all beings on this earth. The good news is that it doesn’t (or shouldn’t) negatively influence the way you feel about yourself or others. The same applies to personal opinions on homosexuality, same sex marriage, religious reconciliation, vanilla ice cream and puppies. Your opinion is yours alone to make. Sadly, I suspect most of Wenski’s employees are volunteers with little to no say in the matter.
Approximately ten years ago, the entire Eucharistic Council of my parish was asked by the Bishop at the time to sign a form declaring that (quote) “homosexuality is a abhorrence” and “those that actively indulge in homosexual behavior are an abomination in the eyes of God” (unquote).
As I read my Bishop’s mandate, something in my head and heart snapped! I could never ever sign that paper. I no longer think it necessary that I remain silent, even if no one else agrees with me. I have stopped “pretending” to support certain church fiats that I disagree with, thinking that I wasn’t hurting anybody by not speaking out. Every day I regret not speaking up for those who could not speak for themselves. It probably wouldn’t have made a difference at the time, but it was the wrong reason not to (respectfully) tell the Bishop how I felt. Mea culpa.
Sadly, I no longer serve in my beloved Church as a minister, but of course, now I am even more convinced that God did not make a mistake with any of His creations. Just pick any of my five children—they may not call or visit me as often as I would like (they are also lousy Pinochle players and for some reason dislike marshmallow peeps, can you imagine?), but they are never, ever an abomination to me or anyone else, and especially not to God. Gay or not, I want them to see the Almighty (and the church they choose to worship in) as welcoming and inclusive.
Strong, personal convictions, one way or another, are to be “respectively considered” even if I don’t agree with how they choose to interpret what I consider the cold, hard facts. The Catholic Church (and many other churches) may never accept homosexuals into full communion during my lifetime, but at the very least, we can respect each other enough to dialogue and “agree to disagree” with open, welcoming arms. Threatening mandates are, in my professional opinion, ineffective in achieving a goal for or against any important issue.
The same goes for political parties and candidates (especially considering the upcoming 2016 elections), gun control, global warming, etc… It is important to talk about all the issues with facts in hand. That’s just common sense right?
Some things are too important not to have a respectful preference (opinion). Some issues demand that you take a stand by speaking up whenever the opportunity presents itself. Your opinion does matter! Don’t allow anyone, regardless of who they are, to silence your voice. If you are proven wrong, you will learn from your mistakes.
If you are right, your action could make all the difference in the world to someone.